I Understand

Hey Everyone,

So I have been thinking and I love the number of readers I am getting. It has blown me away. But it has made me think about whether I am saying stuff that has meaning. I think I am but then again I know how easy it is to just say this stuff. But I am not just saying this for you all. I mean I am but I am also doing it for me. I am doing it to help myself because I understand. I understand what it is like to be a girl. I understand what it is like to be in college. I understand what it is like to be human. I understand. So I thought I would help show that in this  post. By saying I understand. Here is part of my story.

I am not a perfect person. I am quite the opposite. I am not a size two. I am short. I have acne. I don’t have a thigh gap (why is this a thing?). I don’t naturally get straight A’s. I am not always happy. I am not 100% confident. I sometimes feel stressed and under pressure. I apparently have an 'easy major' when in fact it is not. I don’t have a perfect friend group or a perfect love life. I just became single like over a month ago. I have a really messy room at times. I have a love for coffee. I will always eat fries over anything healthy. I get cranky. I make mistakes. I am not perfect. 

Alright that sounds really depressing. Right?!? And that is really frustrating because it makes me feel like I did something wrong. But I didn’t. Because there is nothing wrong with what I said. Almost everything that I said, is what girls experience. Not when it comes to the physical attributes because that is something we are born with. Some girls are naturally skinny, some aren’t, some are tall, some are short etc. But appearances should not truly matter because its more than how we look. It is about the person as a whole. It is more than looks. But girls do experiences the feelings of pressure and unhappiness. There are days when I wake up and I just don’t feel confident and that doesn't mean that there is something wrong with me. It just means that I am human. I understand the lack of perfection and organization at times. I understand how it feels to have doubt and concern. I understand being jealous of other girls or other relationships. I understand almost everything you can think of that a girl will go through. I understand how you feel and I can tell you that it gets better but it will not go completely away because we are all human. But what will also never go away are all the amazing things in life. That is what I hold onto. 

I have an amazing family, who supports through everything. I have equally amazing friends that I do not know what I would do without. I am a college girl at my dream school, studying what I love (which is emotionally and spiritually and mentally challenging at time just saying! But it is worth it). I am on Student Government. I have my own blog and I write for HerCampus CUA. I sing and perform at open mics. I sing with music ministry. I work with Students for Rubio. I model for a store back home. I had an amazing internship last summer that left with me a lot of opportunities. I have so many blessings that I cannot even list all of them and that is way better than the 'curses' I have. 

So I understand. I understand having the days that make you want to stay in bed because everything is so hard. I understand feeling like no matter how hard you try, you feel like you do not look good enough. I understand questioning choices that you make. I understand comparing yourself to others. I get it. I understand. Trust me! I understand. But the funny thing about all of this is, is that someone is comparing themselves to you. We all see the negatives in ourselves and other people see the positives first. So I am not the only one who understands. We all do. We just don't want to always admit it. 

So yes, I know that it is easy to say be happy, accept yourself etc. I know it is hard to do. Because I understand. I know what you are feeling. I know how hard it can be. But you are not alone and you are not the only one. Trust me. All you need to do is make that first step to believing. So read and believe this next paragraph. 

You are more. You are more than a number. You are more than a relationship. You are more than your past. You are more than a stereotype. You are more than judgement. You are more. <3